Weirdness

So I went out looking at baby stuff with my awesome friend Jenny on Sunday. She and her husband Rob are adopting a baby soon, so since we are both in the market for stuff, we wanted to take the chance to research our options for bedding and furniture and whatnot. It was such a blast but so weird at the same time. I guess all this baby stuff is still so unreal right now that I just don't know how to react to it. I found a bunch of cool stuff and I think I found the crib I want too.

It's just weird. I have always loved going out and shopping for baby stuff for friends but I'm so hesitant to buy one thing right now. Mostly because I just don't know where to start but also because I just have that fear buried deep down that I could jinx it at any moment. Hopefully once we have our next check up and get to see the baby again my fears will subside. I truly hope that they do. Plus, I'll know what gummy bear is so I'll know for sure what to look for.

That's it for now..check back with ya later!

Train keeps a movin'

We are in week 19! Yay! One more week and we get to see our baby and finally start calling baby "he or she" instead of "it" or gummy bear (although I like calling baby gummy bear). I am not showing yet, that I can tell, but things are different (I'm a bigger girl anyway so I know it'll take time for it to be obvious that it's not just my tummy). I have been watching one of the girls here at work get more and more pregnant (I think she is at week 28) and I'm getting nervous. Just fear of the unknown, I guess. Plus, It doesn't help the fact that I go to yahoo answers and read weird questions either. I know it's natural to worry, there are so many things that could happen. Will they? Probably not. But who knows. If they do, then we'll deal with it and move forward. Please pray for us!!

We had a nice visit with the in-laws and grandparents last weekend. We even got our first baby gift!! I will post a picture of it. It's a little lamb snuggle thing. Basically an ultra soft blanket with a lamb's head on it. Sounds weirder than it is. Promise. Tomorrow my friend Jenny and I are going to go looking around for ideas for the nursery. Her and her husband have been trying to have a baby for so long with no luck. But they just got their adoption in order and should be on the list soon! Hopefully they will have a baby by the end of the year. I know they will make great parents and after all they have been through, they deserve the chance. Hearing their story makes me really want to adopt one day. But it is very expensive. No wonder there are so many kids in the US that haven't been adopted. The process is expensive and grueling. If only everyone had to go through the process to have kids naturally. We probably wouldn't have the kind of crappy parents that are out there right now popping out kiddos left and right.

ANYWAY -I'm totally off my soapbox now.

I want to tell Jaime how proud of her I am. She is finally getting out of a marriage that has left her unhappy for so long. I know it can't be easy honey but you are going to be fine. And once you are out there and ready, you'll find someone who will love you the right way. I'm always here for you.

I hope all of you are well. I'll keep you updated.

Almost halfway there!

18 Weeks today!! Only 2 left and we'll get to know what our Gummy Bear is! I can't wait. Plus, we'll be halfway through! YAY! It doesn't matter to me what we have, as long as everything is healthy and good. We did get the results of our blood tests and everything is good. No chromosome abnormalities like Down Syndrome or Cystic Fibrosis. That is a relief!!

For a while there I wanted to keep it a surprise because I could wait to find out, after all, it's one of life's biggest surprises, but J just can't. He said there is just too much planning involved to NOT know. And if he knew and I didn't, I would just want to know or it would slip out one day. (I could see it happening like it did on "Friends" - one of my friends would accidentally let it slip). But my friend Amy did point out something, as soon as you know, you can start calling them by their name. That way they recognize it. It's sweet.

Anyway, I'm feeling kind of blah and worn out today. Not sure why, just one of those days I guess. Good thing I'm off tomorrow so maybe I can get some extra sleep. I doubt it since the Grandparents and In-laws will be visiting tomorrow. OH WELL..

C

Starting this thing..

So, upon advice from my friend Kylene (who is a month ahead of me in the pregnancy race) I decided to give this blog thing a try in order to keep those of you far away up to date on goings on in my life. Now I'm not promising anything BUT I will try to keep this as current as I possibly can. I just know how lazy I can be when it comes to this stuff. You have officially been warned people.

I guess the first thing I can do is update you on bebe stuff..Currently we are at 17 weeks and last appointment everything was good. We heard the heartbeat again and the doctor was very happy with where we are at. Our next appointment is Feb 3 and we will find out the sex! We are excited. I don't really have a preference and I don't think J does either. I know if we have a girl he will be putty in her hands. But he has warned me if we have a girl we may not have any more since he can't risk having 2 girls. Just too many boys in the world he'd have to kill and he doesn't want to end up in jail. :)
I am still in disbelief about all this sometimes. I guess once I start feeling baby move around and stuff it'll get more real but right now it's just weird. Weird to talk about, weird to think about, WEIRD. Don't get me wrong, we are both really excited but seeing as some bad stuff has happened to some people we work with, we have proceeded with caution. I guess sometimes I feel like I might jinx it or something. Like I'll be overly happy for a minute and then it'll all just fall apart. But as I have been told J (who is incredibly comforting) its not in our hands and we have to trust that God will provide us with what we need. I truly believe that and it has provided me with some comfort to ease my worried mind.
We have been trying to map out all we can like daycare and trying to fit school in, in the fall. It's just weird to know that you are on the brink of this life changing event and all you can really do is try to hold on for dear life and go with the flow.
Something funny that J said the other day while we were lying in bed - he was making a sandwich and thought "soon I'll have to be making this for a kid too. I'll have to feed the kid." He said that thought made it a little more real to him. I'm glad I'm not the only one that thinks this way!!

We had a late Christmas with my side of the family last weekend. My Aunt and Uncle have a beautiful house out on lake Granbury so they hosted all of us (I think there were 22 of us in all). I honestly love my family. They are all really good people. I'm lucky to have come from such a good lineage. The bad thing about those weekends is time always passes so fast. But we manage to get in a few good games of Monopoly, dominoes, cards, or trivial pursuit. We got to visit with everyone and enjoy the view of the lake on Saturday (it was really cold so we didn't stay outside unless we had to) but Sunday was so nice we stayed out there all morning. I wanted to stay there and just be outside all day but we had to get back to the real world and our dog Mia. She had been alone all night and we just couldn't leave her alone much longer.

This weekend we are going to see J's grandparents from Tyler. They are coming up to visit and see the house. I hope I have time to clean. YIKES!

Well, that is that for now. You all now know what I've been up to. I'll do my best to keep you in "the know"

Love,
C